Thursday, January 21, 2016

20 Witty Responses To “Why Are You Still Single?”

  1. I haven't been cloned yet.
  2. What? Didn't you get the invitation?
  3. Because you don't know how to mind your own business.
  4. No, I am not single. My husband lives in the future
  5. After I get divorced.
  6. I don't want to be half.
  7. Well, this weekend I'm going shopping. I'll put a wife on the list so I don't forget to pick one up.
  8. My mail order spouse is stuck at customs clearance.
  9. Let me get back to you on that
  10. Actually, I got married last week. I would have invited you but we only had room for 1000 guests
  11. The same time as my fiancee.
  12. My husband is not born yet.
  13. When are you getting a lobotomy?
  14. The one for me is also single
  15. Are you offering?
  16. Because the goddamn frog.. never turns into a prince!!
  17. My fiancée has forgotten that we are engaged, so at this point I'm waiting for the Alzheimer's medication to start working.
  18. I haven't finished spending the insurance money from my last husband
  19. I'm not single, I'm double.
  20. My wife is really good at playing hide and seek. I haven't found her yet.

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